By Squee The Goblin
Game = 4/23/2010
March 27 43,548 to April 3 43,548
Squee and Plix entered the gates of SlateWater mid-morning and looked around at the city. Squee lifted his head in the air and drew in a deep breath full of the City’s smell. Meanwhile, Plix was asking the gateguards about a place to stay the night. The Gate guards gestured to Squee and said “There’s a goblin place that people say is pretty good.”
“Goblin place?!? Yeahooo!” Can we Plix? Can we?” Squee excitedly asked, rubbing his green hands together in anticipation.
“Sure, why not!” replied the gnome.
Squee took off like a shot and ran in the direction of the guards pointing and soon was sniffing the air, hoping for a scent. Plix followed, and soon began to scowl and frown at the scents that were assaulting his nose. Squee stood patiently before the small doors to the Old Goblin Inn and Tavern, waiting for his companion. When Plix arrived he nearly gagged at the site and stench wafting from the establishment. It was clean enough, save the dining room. There, a roomful of happy goblins feasted on things that no other races would let their animals touch. The menu board, written in goblin, read “Tonight’s faire: Haggis stuffed with squid, eyeball surprise and cow bits. 5 silver”
Squee poked Plix and pointed to the sign “Cow bits?! Boy, are you in for a treat Plix.”
Squee ordered a meal with Goblin Cider to drink. The wench came over and ladled the “beverage” into a small wide cup. Plix looked at the meal sitting before Squee and turned an odd shade of blue before holding his mouth, looking like he was about to be sick. Squee dug wholeheartedly into his meal, picking up pieces of squid and sheep innards and happily stuffing them into his mouth. Soon, Squee’s upper body was practically covered in grease, sauce, and goo from his meal.
“Plix, why aren’t you eating? This is soooo good!” Squee asked with a partially chewed squid in his teeth, its tentacles dangling from his lips. An ill Plix looked sadly at Squee, and the meal, and the goo covered hands Squee waved about. This coupled with the open-mouth conversation from Squee put Plix over the edge and he quickly ran out of the room and vomited. There was a cheer from the kitchen at word of a non-goblin puking. The owner of the establishment soon came over to Squee’s table, put down a plate of eyeballs and said “Huh, that took longer than it usually does. I once heard of a human puked 500 yards away when he first smelled my dinner cooking.” He said proudly. Squee remembered that most Goblin chefs brag of their cooking making other races sick at distances.